If You Can’t Hold the Silence, You’ll Never Hear the Truth
Sometimes silence builds more trust than your pitch ever could.
We’ve been taught that words win deals.
That articulation is persuasion.
That if we just say the right thing the right way, they’ll say yes.
But the best negotiators?
They don’t always talk.
They wait.
Jim Camp shares a story that feels almost like a parable.
One of his most effective students was a man who couldn’t speak.
He was in a wheelchair, and he sold life insurance using nothing but a whiteboard.
He would write a question, pass it over, and wait.
No filling the silence.
No rambling about policy features.
No “let me tell you why we’re the best.”
Just a question:
“If we lose you, where will your family live?”
And then silence.
No neediness.
Just calm.
Most of us can speak.
And that’s where we get into trouble.
We over-explain.
We solve problems that haven’t been raised.
We pitch to relieve our own discomfort with the quiet.
You ask a prospect,
“What are the top three challenges you’re trying to solve right now?”
And then—you shut up.
They almost always fill the silence.
Sometimes it takes five seconds. Sometimes ten. Sometimes more.
Even if you’re tempted to jump in:
“Could be messaging? Timing? Or maybe just the way it all gets managed?”
Don’t.
Because when you lead them, you rob them.
Let the silence breathe. Let them wrestle with it.
And when they do speak, it’s real.
Because you didn’t rescue them from the discomfort.
You respected their thinking space.
Silence gives them room to discover the answer for themselves.
And people are best convinced by reasons they uncover—not the ones you hand to them.
If you interrupt that process, you don't just lose the silence.
You lose the insight.
You paint seagulls in their picture.
(We’ll talk about that next time.)
P.S.
This page is for those who carry calls in their heads.
For those learning that not every “no” is a loss—and not every “yes” is a win.
🛋 thebuyershrink.com